THIN PLACE--GOD & PUSH UPS

In 1989, I joined the Army. In order to start basic training, I had to do one “man’s” pushup. No problem. I had trained with a hard-core Marine.
I climbed on top of a table and got in “position.”
Two drill sergeants stood on each side of me.
I lowered my torso to the table.
"Lower!” they yelled. “You have to go lower."
I tried.
Again and again, I endeavored to push my chest to the table and back once more.
But my limbs gave out, and I collapsed to the table.
Not making it meant two weeks in Fitness Company (eight hours of physical training for two weeks).
I cried so hard to God, “How could you do this to me? You brought me to New Jersey to fail.”
I was so angry.
Well, I did my two weeks and went onto basic—doing fifty pushups, mind you. But that two-week detour followed me.
I ended up being two weeks late for starting class in Chaplain’s school and had to wait for the next class. The entire class I missed shipped out for the war in Panama.
Then I missed my permanent assignment by two weeks and was reassigned. The position I should have had, went to Desert Storm. And, when I got out, I joined the National Guard, missing the L.A. Riots by two weeks.
I have learned that God has my best interest in mind, even when I can’t see it. He can use even a pushup to protect me; I just need to trust Him.

Bulletin Mistakes

As many people know, I am a church graphic designer, as well as a writer. So it is fun to read how placing words in the wrong order in a bulletin can make for some interesting reading. Here are some famous bulletin mistakes...

The Fasting & Prayer Conference includes meals.
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The sermon this morning: 'Jesus Walks on the Water.'
The sermon tonight: 'Searching for Jesus.'
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Ladies, don't forget the rummage sale. It's a chance to get rid of those things not worth keeping around the house. Bring your husbands.
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Remember in prayer the many who are sick of our community. Smile
at someone who is hard to love. Say 'Hell' to someone who
doesn't care much about you.
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Don't let worry kill you off - let the Church help.
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Miss Charlene Mason sang 'I will not pass this way again,' giving obvious pleasure to the congregation.
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For those of you who have children and don't know it, we have a nursery downstairs.
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Next Thursday there will be tryouts for the choir. They need all the help they can get.
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Irving Benson and Jessie Carter were married on October 24 in the
church. So ends a friendship that began in their school days.
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A bean supper will be held on Tuesday evening in the church
hall. Music will follow.
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At the evening service tonight, the sermon topic will be
'What Is Hell?' Come early and listen to our choir practice.
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Eight new choir robes are currently needed due to the addition of several new
members and to the deterioration of some older ones.
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Scouts are saving aluminum cans, bottles and other items to be
recycled. Proceeds will be used to cripple children.
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Please place your donation in the envelope along with the deceased person you want
remembered.
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The church will host an evening of fine dining, super entertainment and gracious
hostility.
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Potluck supper Sunday at 5:00 PM - prayer and medication to follow.
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The ladies of the Church have cast off clothing of every kind. They may be seen
in the basement on Friday afternoon.
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This evening at 7 PM there will be a hymn singing in the park across from the Church. Bring a blanket and come prepared to sin.
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Ladies Bible Study will be held Thursday morning at 10 AM. All ladies are invited to
lunch in the Fellowship Hall after the B. S. Is done.
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The pastor would appreciate it if the ladies of the Congregation would lend him their electric girdles for the pancake breakfast next Sunday.
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Low Self Esteem Support Group will meet Thursday at 7 PM. Please use the back door.
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The eighth-graders will be presenting Shakespeare's Hamlet in the Church basement
Friday at 7 PM. The congregation is invited to attend this tragedy.
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Weight Watchers will meet at 7 PM at the First Presbyterian Church. Please use large double door at the side entrance.
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The Associate Minister unveiled the church's new campaign slogan last
Sunday: 'I Upped My Pledge - Up Yours.’

TAPS TO THE SOUL

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DO YOU HAVE WHAT IT TAKES TO BE A PUBLISHED AUTHOR?

Answer these four questions:
1. DO YOU HAVE AN INCREDIBLE PASSION FOR WRITING? Like in anything, you have to be passionate about your field. A pastor once said about ministry, "You know you're called when you aren't happy doing anything else."
2. ARE YOU WILLING TO DO WHAT IT TAKES? If you want to be published, you have to be willing to train, and hone your craft. You can't expect to get published, if you aren't willing to join a critique group, attend writer's conferences, read books, take courses, etc.  Think about the business world.  A person who sits at his or her desk just doing his or her thing, doesn't get far. But the successful person is always in motion--networking, training, etc.
3. ARE YOU WILLING TO FIGHT FOR IT? If you want to be published bad enough, you'll need to fight for it. That means you don't interpret one NO as a reason to give up. You keep fine tuning your piece ... then send, send, send it out some more.  I have a binder full of rejection letters, but I also have a shelf full of published poems, plays, and books. I didn't listen to my English professor when he told me I'd never be published. There are a lot of writers in this world being published. Fight to be one of them.
4. DO YOU HAVE THE PATIENCE? So, you did it. You finally sent your manuscript. Now, you have to be patient. The writing world is SLOW!  No news might be good news.  Don't bug them. The  waiting time for a response can be three months to a year.  Keep in mind, if you bug them, you'll be sending your work out to someone else the following week---and the wait will start again.

COMING SOON

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SDCWG Conference 2008

This last weekend, September 26-27, 2008, I had the awesome opportunity to meet my editor from Meriwether Publishing, Rhonda Wray. I had the best time getting to know her. I always knew she was a sweet woman, now I think I can honestly call her friend.

Also, I stepped out of my comfort zone of being an author trying to get published, to an editor offering consultations and advice. It was weird stepping into the other side of the galaxy. I say, "galaxy," because that is how far away it felt. I have a whole new respect for editors and agents. Which brings me to the point of this blog. The faculty sit through proposal after proposal. They are asked lots of questions. And by the end of the day, they probably wonder, "Is it worth it?" If you ever consider attending a conference in the future, help the editors/agents by doing the following (And just so you know, I've been guilty of a few of these in the past):
1. CREATE A ONE-SHEET. This is a one page, easy to read sheet that lists the title, word count, genre, a SHORT summary of the book, an author's short bio, and the audience. Occasionally, it will have some marketing ideas as well.
2. DON'T BRING YOUR WHOLE MANUSCRIPT. Most agents/publishers need to get on a plane. With all the costs of luggage, don't expect them to take it with them. Also, they have 15 minutes with you. All they need to see is the first chapter and maybe a summary. That's it.
3. KNOW WHO YOU'RE MEETING WITH. I'm a romance/young adult editor, and yet, I had a bunch of people meet with me who write non-fiction devotionals. Before you book an appointment, make sure that the editor can help you. If not, it is a waist of both of your times.
4. MEMORIZE AN ELEVATOR PITCH. When someone asks you what your book is about, you should be able to tell them in 20-words or less. Editors have lots of people to talk to, so give it to them quickly. Also, learn a 50-word pitch in case the editor wants to know more.
5. DON'T BE DEFENSIVE. I know it is hard when you put your "baby" out there, but don't try an defend it to the hilt. The editor and agents know what sells. If they say fix something, they aren't saying "you stink," they are saying, "If you ever want to be published, these are the steps you're going to have to walk through." The choice is yours.

Like I said, I've been guilty of the some of the above. But after stepping into the role of editor, I now understand why those five things are so important!